The Stray Shoes

If you were to drive to the on ramp of the highway near my house and glace to your left, you would spy a men's (or abnormally large ladies) tan colored, canvas, slip on shoe.  If you were to go a little further up the ramp and glace to the right, you would spy its partner.  These shoes were abandoned a few months ago and are now faded and one has been run over a few times, but they are still there.  I have the habit of making the story as to how said shoes came to be abandoned along the side of the on ramp and some of them are funnier than others.  Today's story made this sleep deprived girl laugh so I thought I would share.

One day, a man named Ben and his attractive, but not so smart, girlfriend were driving along this same route.  Enjoying a warm spring day, Ben it the top down on his convertible.  While stopped at the light just before the ramp, Ben's girlfriend (who somehow made it through the story nameless) notices a spider crawling up the door.  After her initial scream, she demands for Ben to take of one of his shoes so she can squish the spider.  He looked at her like she was crazy, but then he remembered what "trophy girlfriend" meant and sighing, he slipped off his shoe-his brand new, tan colored, canvas slip on from Old Navy. 

Ben's girlfriend swatted at the spider, but she missed causing him to dart up the door toward the top.  She swatted again and a third time.  Now, the spider was on the edge of the door.  She knew she would get him this time.  She smashed the spider.  In her jubilant celebration, she accidentally tossed the shoe over Ben's head and onto the shoulder.

"Why did you do that????" His exasperation was impossible to mask. 

"Oops.  It was an accident.  I'm really sorry, Benny!  Here, I can fix this.  Give me the other one."

Everything in him told him not to do so, but he handed her the other shoe.  She tossed it out her window, smiled, and said, "See, I told you I would fix it."

Ben stared at her for a second before asking, "And just how did you fix anything?  Now I don't have either shoe!!"

"Well," she replied, "Now when someone finds them, they'll be a pair."

And I just wonder why poor old shoeless Ben didn't stop or at least stop the next time he drove through.  So, yes, these are the strange musings of a tired mama driving down the road.